So here we are, just about over the hump. The term is now more than halfway over, and midterm exams and papers are soon to be mere shadows of the past. But then what? You may feel a bit confused with your newfound freedom. For the last couple of weeks, you have been overwhelmed with work and have gradually lost all notions of leisure. Now, all of the sudden, you find yourself knocked off your feet by a wave of free time. Naturally, you are disoriented. In such a state, there is a real danger that you will not make the most of this crucial time and maximize your leisure. As a self-proclaimed expert in leisure and the art of slacking off, I am here to help with this easy and brief five-step process.

1. Weep like a baby.

There is no better catharsis than a good crying session. Don’t be afraid to shed tears—not tears of sorrow, but rather tears of joy. The thought of the snowcapped mountains on Keystone cans and the wide, majestic expanse of the pong table after a long absence can bring the manliest of Dartmouth’s men to their knees sobbing. So let it all out before you head out for the night. After all, you wouldn’t want a sudden outburst in the middle of a frat basement only to be pelted with cups of beer.

2. Throw out your old notes.

At this point you want anything that reminds you of the horrid gantlet you just ran out of your sight. So get rid of all your old notes, and maybe even tear up the first half of your syllabus. Of course, if you have some sort of cumulative final at the end of your term, you will be screwed. I guess you could aggressively shove them away somewhere retrievable, but doing so wouldn’t give you the same immediate satisfaction as physically ripping the sheets of paper. The choice is up to you.

3. Eat a Quadzilla.

Though I have yet to eat one of these magnificent manifestations of cuisine, I assure you, I will soon. Containing four juicy beef patties, the Quadzilla is one of the most alluring “secret” items not on the menu of the Food Court grill. Don’t worry; you’re going to rage the carbs and calories all away anyway. Wolf it down fast for maximum enjoyment. And then maybe sit down with a nice Vermonster for desert.

4. Attend a dance party.

Just as the crying served as a mental release, dancing serves the same purpose for your body. Now, I hate dancing. But after a few “refreshments,” these can be an enjoyable experience for even the most rhythmically challenged. And remember, you’re not looking to perform an aesthetic masterpiece; you just want to loosen up and relieve some stress. Between Chi Gam and Tri-Kap, there’s sure to be a dance party going on, and if you’re lucky you might pick up some crucial tips on sketchiness for the future.

5. Laugh at the people studying in Novack.

I have never understood why people go to study in Novack. It’s noisy, there’s no privacy, the allure of packaged food at comically high prices is mere meters away, and drunken people are always stumbling into chairs trying to cross through. Nonetheless, on any given night, there are at least two people huddled over their laptops with textbooks open. Well, now is your chance to have a good laugh at them. Perhaps some of these poor people still have stray midterms to take, or maybe they’re just excessively studious. Either way, they are ripe for the picking (on), so feel free to openly mock them and establish your superiority…in laziness and comparative lack of ambition. After a night of revelry, the jibes should come naturally to you.

We are given plenty of advice on how to prepare for the midterm period, but a how-to for this period afterward is sorely lacking. In some ways, it can be even more stressful than the midterm period itself. While that last statement is completely untrue, hopefully this short guide will make your post-midterm period more enjoyable and less stressful. Follow these five steps, and I assure you, you’ll never have to suffer post-midterm stress disorder.